Category Archives: Career

Fear and Trust

“Our own apathy and fear keep us from presenting the Word.” – Curt Walters

Photo Credit: Libby Norcross, www.libbydoodle.com

So often we become caught up in obsessing over our “Calling” in this world. We spend hours upon hours, and dollars upon dollars, trying to discern what we are supposed to do with our lives. We think a clear path is waiting for us. We think we need to see the ‘end result’ before we see the path to travel on the way.

Yesterday (Sunday, May 11, 2014) I listened while my pastor blew this notion out of the water.

The title for the morning sermon was “The World’s First Mission Trip.” It wasn’t what we usually think of when we hear the words “mission trip.” This was about Paul and Barnabas being sent out from the church in Antioch. The only plan they had was to share the gospel with those they met on their journey. They went where the Holy Spirit led, with no specific destination in mind.

When was the last time your church sent out a missionary this way? Most likely, never.

God had a plan for this particular sermon on this particular day. (As I suspect is always the case.)

The day before, Pastor Jerry Van Oyen passed away. Pastor Van Oyen was the minister at my church when I was young. From the earliest I can remember, until Middle School, he was the man on the pulpit.

Since then, about a 30 year time frame, he left to pastor and lead churches in a variety of places and a variety of ways. Eventually, as ‘retirement’ settled in, he and his wife Ellen, returned to my church. But he never stopped being a pastor. More importantly, he never stopped being a true evangelist. From Mexico to Cutlerville, and every point in between, he was truly an evangelist. His wife even quipped that he wouldn’t be of any use in Heaven. I’ll have to tell her I disagree.

Even as I sat in the pew yesterday morning, Pastor Van Oyen was evangelizing and leading. He was leading me.

Combined with the sermon, I became more than ever confident of my calling from God.

So often we are afraid to truly give ourselves to the leading of the Lord. We’re afraid he will send us to the most uncomfortable place in the world. We pray for leading. We pray for proper preparation. Do we truly embrace and release ourselves to what he has in store for us? Do we give in and let fear hold us back?

I know I’ve been pushing back a bit. Out of fear of the unknown I decide to hold back. No more.

I am confident in my current calling. God wants me to write. God wants me to speak. God wants me to share my story with you. Whatever I have to give, I will give. Whatever trust issues I had, I will toss aside. I will listen to his speaking. I will go where he wants me to go. I will write and speak the words he gives me. I will share.

Once I decided to let go of my fear, God provided.

I have a speaking engagement on my calendar. The third weekend in June I will be in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I wasn’t sure how I was going to make it happen. Once I released my fear, and placed my full trust in God’s plan for me, it became clear. God provided a way for me to be in Tulsa.

I look forward to sharing my calling and God’s plan with all of you.

So, toss off your own fear. Listen intently. Follow and go where you are called. Trust. Truly trust in his plan. He knows what he is doing.

Have you been holding back because of fear? Where have you pushed fear aside to follow God’s plan?

#Next3Decades

I Was Fired

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It was the worst day. It was also the best day.

[youtube id=”sH6unNljq7E?t=2m22s” height=”200″ width=”400″]
(Skip to 2:22 for the important point I’d like to make with this clip. Or, watch the whole thing because it’s very funny.)

One year ago today, April 30, 2013, I was fired. These words ended my 16 year career with the company: “Today is your last day with us. We are letting you go.” Just like that, I was unemployed.

Wow. Shock. Total and complete shock. I cleaned out my desk like I was in a trance. On my way home, I called my wife. I was crying so hard it was difficult for her to understand what I was saying. (Thank goodness for hands free technology. I could talk, wipe tears, and drive all at the same time.)

I could spend more time sharing the emotions I was being bombarded with during those first few days (worst days), but I’d rather share more about the many days since the shock wore off (best days).

Some may want to ask “How can the same day be the ‘worst’ and the ‘best’?” Easy. Go back and watch the clip from City Slickers again.

The feelings of it being the ‘worst’ day wore off quickly. They did resurface occasionally, but not often.

The feelings of it being the ‘best’ day arrived quickly and have remained. I often tell people the ‘best’ day feelings first showed up within a couple of hours of being let go.

I knew. I knew deep down in my heart. God knew for years. I didn’t feel His gentle nudging. Multiple times, over the course of a number of years, I was blind to His desire for me to leave. So what did He do? He got me fired. I wouldn’t walk out the door on my own, so God shoved me out. He didn’t pull me out, or lead me out with His arm around my shoulders. He placed His foot on my rear and booted me out the door.

It was a Tuesday. 4:30 in the afternoon.

Almost every Friday morning I have breakfast with two friends. Somehow my sudden unemployment became the topic of discussion when we met the Friday after I was fired. My friend Duane recommended a book he had heard about. The timing was perfect. Within a few days I had the recently released, New York Times Best-Selling book, Start in my hands.

God booted me out the door. My friend made a recommendation. Jon Acuff was there to help me START.

Some people may be tempted to call this an Anniversary. I typically associate anniversaries with happy occasions. Getting fired is most certainly NOT a happy occasion.

However, the past year has most definitely been a happy occasion.

I now work 40 hours a week instead of 60-65 hours.

I spend time with my teenage sons.

I’m nicer to my family.

I enjoy life.

I’m reconnecting with my beautiful wife.

I’m dreaming.

I’m building.

I weigh less. (And I’m still going down.)

I’m healthier. Physically, mentally, emotionally.

I’m growing closer to my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

I’m writing this blog.

I’m writing a book (or two).

I’m preparing to speak in front of a crowd at a conference in Tulsa in June. (Launch Out)

It was the worst day. It was the BEST day.

Here’s to the #Next3Decades!

Dreaming With My Spouse

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A few weeks ago I sat down on the couch with my wife. There really isn’t anything unusual in that action. It seems we do this every night. But this night was a bit different. Neither of us turned on the TV. I actually asked her to sit next to me. I wanted to share my dream with her.
That action and request by me was the unusual part.

We’ve been married for 20 years.

I don’t ever remember sitting down together to share our dreams.

I had written my BIG DREAM down on paper a couple of weeks earlier. I had even gone to the trouble of planning out a time-line for achieving my dream. I have, on paper, a rough sketch of the next 3 years and what actions I would like to take in order to achieve my BIG DREAM. I won’t bore you with the details, but it begins with a few small steps this year. Next year a few more steps, larger steps, are planned. The final year leading up to the BIG DREAM, includes a few ginormous steps.

How in the world have my wife and I been married for over 20 years and never intentionally taken the time to discuss and write down our BIG DREAMS? Some of you may think this inconceivable! I’m suddenly in agreement. Now I have a desire to share more often. If my wife and I are truly on the same team (#TeamTheule), we should have full knowledge of each other’s dreams, goals, and desires.

My wife had an idea of what my BIG DREAM looks like. She knows I want to write and speak. But we have never talked about it on purpose. As I look back over our 20+ years of marriage, I can’t help but wonder how many times we missed out on something incredible because we didn’t share our thoughts with each other. We’ll both tell you we were too busy to think about BIG DREAMS. For a majority of our marriage we have lived in survival mode.

When we were first married, I was still in college. My wife began working full-time as a Registered Nurse three months after our wedding. I was struggling through another semester of college. I can remember dropping her off at the hospital for her night shift. In the morning I would pick her up and we’d make our way to the college campus where I would spend my day while she went home to sleep. Later in the day she would pick me up. We would have a couple of hours together, and then I’d bring her to work. Let me say this as politely as possible: Third shift sucks when you are a newlywed. (My wife would probably tell you it sucks no matter what the situation.)

So, we didn’t spend very much time together. This wasn’t the best situation for our new marriage, but how were we to know any better? I needed to finish school, and she had a full-time job. Perfect right? No. Not perfect. Not perfect for most marriages, but particularly bad for our new marriage. We needed to spend time together. We hadn’t been in close proximity to each other for the two and a half years leading up to our wedding in December of 1993. After graduating from college in 1991, my wife went home. 2,400 miles away. Yep. We survived a long distance relationship. Within about a month of her leaving I knew I had to go after her. I called and asked if I could hop a plane to visit her. Thankfully she said yes. That was the first of many planes I hopped to go visit her. But a few in-person visits, many phone calls, and quite few letters, cannot replace proximity when you are trying to learn everything about your future spouse. (I wonder how different it would be now with texting and Facetime and Google Hangouts available.)

Every time we saw each other in person we had to become acquainted again. The experience is somewhat similar to being involved in a great online community, say through a closed Facebook Group, and then suddenly meeting some of your great online friends in person.

In a sense, the cards were stacked against us. We never learned how to properly communicate face to face. We got married, life together began, two incredible boys came along, and we continued to live in the craziness of life. In the blink of an eye, 20 years went by.

Last spring life came to a momentary halt. I lost my job of 16 years. I was suddenly given more time than I ever imagined. Time to think and reflect on my life. Now what? Over the last 10 months I believe I’ve figured it out. I figured out what the BIG DREAM is for me. I went back to work two short months after losing my job. I’m doing essentially the same thing I was for the 16 previous years. But now I have an idea of where I’m called to go. I have an idea of the BIG DREAM for my future. I’m not quitting my current job anytime soon because as I once heard a very wise woman say, “Income helps.”

I’m looking forward to more time sitting on the couch with my incredibly patient and understanding wife. She has dreams too. I think. Maybe we should sit on the couch tonight.

Do you communicate well with your spouse? Do you share your BIG DREAM?
If you’re not married, do you have someone with whom you share your BIG DREAM?

#Next3Decades