Tag Archives: Encouragement

Ch, Ch, Ch, Changes

Changes. Everything changes. Always.

Over the last few weeks there have been quite a few changes.

My oldest son has graduated from high school. Son number two spent a couple of days in the hospital and was separated from his appendix. In a couple of days he’ll turn 16 (huge changes for him). My wife received her official acceptance into grad school. And for me, the company I work for changed owners.

All of those changes are significant, but they also reflect stability and “sameness”.

The oldest son will continue his schooling, but it will be at the next level.

Son number two is all healed up and back to normal. He’ll turn 16 and get his driver’s license soon. Daily life will continue.

My wife will continue to be a nurse. She will also be going to grad school, but not much will change. She’ll be working during the day and studying in the evening and on the weekend.

I’ll still be performing the same duties and tasks at my day job. New logo. New shirts. Answer the phone in a different manner. But still the same.

We all go through changes. No matter what, change will happen. Stress tends to come with change. We worry about new people, new experiences, new ways of going about our daily tasks. But we adjust.

How do we adjust? When things are changing, what do you hold on to? Is there something in your life keeping you stabilized during changes?

What I learned from NOT writing my first book. Yet.

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During the summer of 2014 I was convinced I was going to write a book. My first book. I had a topic, and I had ideas pouring out of my head. The passion to write a book was oozing out of me. I even made an announcement right here on my blog. “I’m Writing A Book” July 2014

I was gung-ho. I was all in. The ideas pouring out of my head were pure gold!

And then a few weeks passed. And a few more. And a few more.

I was still committed to writing the book. I even made it my “Push Goal” in January when I went through a program to help me determine and define my goals for 2015.

I took my notes from the previous six months and created an outline for the book. I divided the notes into the appropriate sections.

My trusty journal was with me every day so I could capture ideas and thoughts and quotes for the book.

But there was one problem.

The passion was gone.

Did I still want to write the book? You bet! This is something I’ve dreamed of for a couple of years. “I’m going to write a book!”

I tried. I really did. I sat down with my notes and laptop a few times. But I couldn’t move forward.

Without the passion for the topic, I was paralyzed. I couldn’t move forward. As much as I wanted to, I couldn’t continue.

So a few weeks ago I decided to stop. I told some friends. I told my wife. I told 2,200 friends in a closed Facebook group who I’ve been interacting with for almost two years.

Do you know what happened? Everyone who commented, and everyone I spoke with, including my wife, congratulated me for being able to set it aside. They know how badly I want to write. They know writing and speaking is what I’m supposed to be doing. They also knew something I didn’t. They knew setting aside the book would help me write more. They knew setting aside the book would help me feel free to be the person I need to be.

You see, the book I’m NOT writing is about encouragement. I’m passionate about pouring into others. The pressure I put on myself to write the book stopped me from being the encourager I want to be.

I was trying to write a book about encouragement, but I wasn’t encouraging anyone. Including myself.

Since setting the book aside I’ve been able to return to the activities that originally spurred the idea of writing the book.

I’ve talked to more people on the phone. I’ve talked to more people face-to-face. I’ve been intentional about touching base with people in real life and online.

I’m happier. I’m not stressed every time I do something on my day off not related to writing the book.

And one other thing has happened. I’ve written notes for the book in my journal almost every day.

So while I’m no longer writing the book, I’m making progress on writing the book. I can’t wait for you to read it. Eventually.

Have you ever set aside a project and reaped incredible rewards? Did you eventually go back and complete the project?

I’m A Seed Planter

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“I can’t ever fill anybody’s cup, but I can be responsible for emptying mine.” – Andy Stanley

Pouring out needs to be about emptying my own cup. No matter what is happening, the objective of encouragement should be to pour out into others. Whatever they may need, my action should be to pour myself into them.

Pour encouragement into them. Lift them up. Give them hope.

Pouring out is about emptying my own cup. Don’t pick the people to fill. Simply work on emptying my own cup.

How do I know if what I am pouring out is helpful?

I may never know.

Encouragement, many times, includes planting seeds you may not see grow to maturity. The point of emptying yourself isn’t to see what great and glorious results come from it. The point is to be willing to REFRESH, ENCOURAGE, and INSPIRE others.

Plant seeds of encouragement. Don’t worry about the results. Continue to encourage, and the results will be handled by God.

I am called to pour out. I am not called to celebrate the results.

Does this mean if I’m made aware of the results, if someone thanks me and tells me of their own success, I shouldn’t rejoice? No. Not at all.

The point I’m trying to make is to not expect and wait for the results. Continue to encourage. Continue to inspire.

As I read through Mark Batterson’s The Circle Maker for the second time, the idea of “think long” came upon me in a different manner.

Thinking long now includes thinking of the impact of my life far into the future. What exactly am I doing today to impact the lives of the generations to come after me? From the standpoint of immediate family, the prayers I offer for my sons will most certainly impact their children, their grandchildren, and their great-grandchildren. I may not be physically present to experience the lives of those future generations, but I can certainly do something right now to have an impact on their lives.

The more I pour into my boys, the more I am intentional about encouraging them, the bigger impact it may have on those future generations. It is not for me to determine what happens in the future. It is simply to fulfill God’s calling on me to the current generation. God will take care of the future. My duty, my calling, is to plant seeds.

Are you pouring out? Are you planting seeds?